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The Ultimate Success Tool
Get Anything You Want with ARC
(Affinity, Reality and Communication)
By using this powerful tool, you can form a meaningful relationship with anyone
you like. Based on these relationships, you can get the raise, promotion, sale,
contract, friendship, marriage, support or cooperation you need.
“The ARC Triangle is the keystone of living associations.” -- L. Ron Hubbard
ARC (pronounced as A-R-C, not “ark”) forms the basis for all of your
relationships. L. Ron Hubbard discovered the rules and uses of ARC during the
1950s.
Every relationship has three parts:
Affinity: how much you like or love a person
Reality: how much agreement you have with a person; what you agree to be real
Communication: your exchange of information and ideas
These three parts interact with each other and so form a triangle.
Part 1: How ARC Works
Purdue University did a study a few years ago to determine why some of their
graduates succeeded and others did not. After several years of analyzing the
success of their engineering students, Purdue came to the following conclusions:
"The average salary of the students with the highest grades was only slightly
higher than the average salary of all the graduates. The salaries of the most
popular students, the ones with the good personalities, were much higher than
the average of all students. Also, their salaries were much higher than the
students with the highest grades."
A popular personality is based on ARC. When you have good ARC with people, they
understand you, believe in you, trust you, help you and feel good about you. ARC
is such a powerful tool that the simple lack of ARC results in upsets, distrust,
hatred and attacks.
"Understanding is composed of affinity, reality and communication." -- L. Ron
Hubbard
The ARC Triangle gives you a deeper understanding of people. When you truly
understand your spouse, children, boss, coworkers, employees, customers,
clients, neighbors and friends, you can help them, talk to them, reach more
agreements and enjoy their company more than ever before.
You have more ARC for some people than others. For example, you have high ARC
with a coworker or colleague if you like the person (Affinity), can talk about
many subjects (Communication) and agree on many subjects (Reality). You
understand this person and this person understands you.
You probably also know someone with whom you have low ARC. You cannot agree on
things (Reality), you do not like the person very much (Affinity) and you do not
communicate.
In Part One of this series of articles on ARC, you will learn how you can easily
increase your ARC with anyone.
How to Increase ARC with Anyone
"The triangle of affinity, reality and communication could be called an
interactive triangle in that no point of it can be raised without affecting the
other two points and raising them, and no point of it can be lowered without
affecting the other two points." -- L. Ron Hubbard
So all you need to do is decide which point of the triangle you can increase and
the other two points automatically rise!
In other words, if you increase the volume or quality of communication you have
with someone, you are raising the C point of the triangle. As a result, the A
point and the R point both rise. If you simply talk about anything to a person
for enough time (C), the person likes you more (A) and agrees with you more (R).
For example, you meet a new fellow at work named Richard and instantly dislike
him. Maybe his attitude or appearance rubs you the wrong way. You really don’t
want to communicate with him (C) or to agree on any reality with him (R). There
is little or no understanding.
However, you decide you need to understand Richard so you can work with him. So
you ask yourself, “Which of the three points can I raise?” You decide to work on
the C part of the triangle and just start talking to him. “Where did you work
before?” “How long have you lived in this area?” “Do you have any kids?”
As a result of your communication, you find out he has three kids about the same
age as your kids. You share a reality here and so you chat about children. You
find yourself agreeing with Richard. Within a few minutes, you realize you like
Richard. You understand each other better than before. You look forward to
working with him.
As another example, you want to have more ARC and a better understanding of
Stella. Stella could be your boss, an important client, a potential mate or
other valuable contact. You currently know little about Stella, but have
scheduled to meet with her for lunch.
During lunch, you notice Stella is not talking very much. She rarely looks at
you and barely smiles. You realize the Communication point of the triangle is
not very good with Stella. The Affinity point is also weak as she does not seem
to like you very much. So you decide to raise the Reality point of the triangle.
You look for things to agree on. “How do you relax after work?” “What kind of
exercise do you like?” “Do you have a vacation coming up?”
Stella mentions she loves sailboats and you happen to be a sailboat fanatic.
Because of this shared Reality point of the triangle, you and Stella suddenly
have a lot to talk about. After several minutes of sailboat chat, you notice she
is smiling at you and you feel a higher level Affinity for her.
As a final example, you want a better relationship with your spouse. You have
not been talking very much lately and seem to disagree more often than before.
You decide to increase the Affinity point of the triangle in your marriage.
Before you go home, you decide to just feel more Affinity. You think of all the
things you like about your spouse. After a few minutes, your mood improves and
you look forward to going home.
At home, you give your spouse a big smile. You hug and kiss your spouse. At
first, he or she is a little shocked, but soon starts to return the affection
and your Affinity point rises. You talk about your day’s events (C) and agree
(R) on your plans for the evening. Your ARC Triangle is higher than it has been
for a while.
This is the power of ARC. With this knowledge, you can rehabilitate or create a
wonderful relationship with anyone.
Recommendations
1. Write down something you want. Do not limit yourself to money or physical
objects, but consider new opportunities, powerful contacts, new or deeper
friendships, contracts or deals, promotions, projects you want to do and so on.
2. List the names of people who can help you get it.
3. Decide which point of the triangle you can increase with each person:
Affinity, Reality or Communication.
4. Increase that one point with each person until the other two points of the
triangle increase.
5. Continue to increase your ARC Triangle with each person until you reach your
objective.
In future articles, we will cover more ways you can use this powerful tool to
form friendships with strangers, become a better leader, negotiate better deals,
increase your success at work, improve your marriage and boost your self
confidence.
Learn more about ARC in the book The Problems of Work by L. Ron Hubbard,
available at
www.tipsforsuccess.org/bookstore.htm and www.bridgepub.com.
The Ultimate New Relationship Tool:
Affinity, Reality and Communication (ARC), Part 2
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